The meeting

Ok. So this isn’t exactly what I thought it would be... It’s funny really; I always have this preconception in mind that if I were to introduce my boyfriend to mama and papa it would be the traditional type(an intimate tête-à-tête at home) with him compelled to prepare for it (looking fresh, descent, and with something on hand). It turns out to be the exact opposite! Of course I never dreamed of introducing him on cam… and certainly not after binging on lechon (I swear his lips looked like he has just put on lipgloss on cam).

My whole clan knows about him, even my parents, that’s why he can visit me at home whenever he wants to. I don’t know… the thought of hiding something as important as Jayson to my parents never crossed my mind, they already knew about him a week since the day he started courting me. But they just can’t bring themselves to talk to him because they still can’t believe that their “lil’ doll is all grown up” and is in a relationship with a guy. Anyway, it turned out to be pretty well… Jayson kept calling them “ma’am” and “sir” at first and ended the conversation calling my mama “ate”. Papa is, as he said, “more intimidating”. lol… I swear… I didn’t know what to do to ease his anxiety while they fire one question to another. The least I can do was rub his back to know I’m there.

Thanks ma! Thanks pa (and happy birthday too)! You guys are the best! Don’t worry 10 o’clock is even too late a curfew for him. He has to study too you know... I love you guys! I love you too Jayz! and you really did well. better than wahat we have practiced.. =)♥♥♥

my cellphone sucks!

... or is it just my network? (T0T)

I wasn't able to attend Meloi's birthday party because of you. And I spent 2 days (2 WHOLE FREAKING DAYS!!!!!) twitching in my seat during my review because I thought Jayson forgot about our monthsary, I almost gone mad! Arggghhhh.!!!!!!!

I swear if this happens again. I’ll drown you in water!

P.S. Happy birthday again Meloi!

And Happy monthsary Jayz! I don’t hate you, I love you.

And phone, I swear if you fail to do your job for my communication again.. I’ll definitely giving you up to my sister. I’ll prefer her plain nokia over you!

old school

Grade school has been the dirtiest ( I mean literally filthy) years in my entire student life. Its when I run around the campus looking like a mad maniac while munching my tootsie roll on hand. Its also the time when grades and certificates are for my parent while rewards thereafter are for me.

*sighs deeply* I miss my childhood friends. The fun we had during break time at the basketball court playing anything from girlish jackstone and ten-twenty to brusque lupa langit, anak-anakay, and tigso… who could ever forget our endless merienda of creams bisqcuit and halo-halo from the bookstore? Even our petty quarrels whenever we disappoint each other during games are precious to me.

I miss my teachers (especially Ma’am Dyne who boost my confidence that I can actually be good in writing). I miss the campus (especially our small garden at the back that painted my description of the garden in “The secret”). The plain, 1-peso worth of junkfoods, and even our guard who patiently look after us whenever our sundo fails to come on time.

And now after 10 years, we finally had our grand reunion * throwing kisses on facebook and Friendster* . Some have careers fresh on their shoes, others are student still vying for honors, while a few (like me) had just recently bid goodbye to school.

I know it will take a few months before we’ll meet and goof around like this again, but I’m looking forward to it. Relieving our grade school years and listening to your amazing lifestories had been both comforting and blissful. I’ll definitely see you again!

... And oh.. lemme introduce you to my bestfriends since elementary.. Shem ( nursing grad from SPC) and Karla (also nursing grad from ADDU). see? Even through the years we still have somethings in common. that's why we're friends!

my own blend of ambivalence

happy monthsary Jayz....

I hate you.
I hate you.
I love you
I hate you.

♥♥And ummm.... I love you♥♥

Mushy I know!

I was scavenging my diary last night and saw this letter I made for someone close to me in church when I was in high school. Anyway, I just thought of sharing it with you guys ( yeah.. I know its mushy and all but I still think it's cute... =) )

A letter for you:

I saw you this morning; you were your usual self. So carefree, unaware of the beauty you hold within. Unconsciously (or a little voluntarily), my eyes would gaze upon your direction. Those boyish smile is enough to lose my resolve, Oh I pray to our God that you will one day offer me even just one of your smiles, a desperate plea, but one I can trade my soul to. And those eyes, those are my favorite. It displays confidence and humility at the same time, it speaks to people by itself, it reflects how you take pleasure on things, it was never sad, it constantly allures people you are talking with. I pray heaven will permit me to see your soul through those eyes again.

However, that's far from possible, to you, I have never existed. I was merely a replica of someone really close to you. You used to say that we were soul sisters but do you know what differs me from her? She has you, whereas I, I only want you. I Love You. Funny I can say those words when we have not talked for ages. The last time was the day before you went to Manila. You read to me every message from your inbox, I can’t remember those quotes really, all I cared that time was you and me together in a room, I was delirious, overwhelmed by the fact that you finally allowed me to get a glimpse of your own private world. I remembered how softly your voice came out as you read to me those words. Even the angels must be in glee for the morning stars were shining so brightly that night. That was then, we were to start a beautiful friendship and endless possibilities of you and I together had played on my mind. I was hopeful. But destiny never gave us a chance….

Classes would soon start and you have to go. Time crushed me. We have not even started and you must go. College was different my dear, friends are few and acquaintances are countless, we both have our own lives to live, we have lost touch. But you know what? Aside from 12 hours of sleep, I would look forward to semester break because it would mean talking to you again even if it means a minute of how are yous . It would create a warm feeling surging inside me every time you talk. And during worship, I would praise God some more knowing that you’re home again and that you came safe.

Now, two years have passed and I never get tired of praying for you. You like books don’t you? Have you read Nicholas Spark’s “A Walk to Remember”? I have drawn inspiration to Jaime. One day, my prayers would realize. The universe will conspire in making those dreams come to life. But too much time has passed. And things are too different now, We have nothing else to talk about but there are tons of things I would love to know. How are you? How is Sophia? Do you still remember the wonderful time we had during the summer camp? *sigh* Questions after questions I would like to ask but every time I am to go over and talk to you, friends would flock to your seat. I guess they miss you too. That is one thing I absolutely admire about you. You draw people at your pole. You have stories to tell. They ask about your life in the big city and you would articulately relate to them how different it is to Davao and that you will never dream of living there for a long time. Though you answer their every question politely with a smile, there are times when you look so serene, almost ethereal to look at, your face looking down feeling the fresh air as everybody mingles around during lunch.

Next week, if by chance we will see each other again, then it would be beautiful. Maybe I can muster enough courage to atleast say hello to you. But for now, I have to say my nightly prayer. I will still be praying for you, but unlike before, I will now instead pray for your health and safety. Of course I will still hope for your attention but I figured that I cannot go on to this lunacy. I like you now and I pray to God to take this feelings away. Tonight, I will pray for something else, I pray for that somebody whom God has reserved for me, only for me, and hopefully tonight that someone is praying for me too.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

poetry 2

A broken heart
A broken hope
I feigned indolence
I prayed for the one...
yet i still give in
now...
Again
I'm broken

poetry

photo from here

...Somehow music is but harmony is not


Oh! How emotion can deceive


But love was never an option


No! Love can never be an option....

almost lover....

for more of her videos, click here

... Such a wonderful song yet so sad. This is for my past juvenile crushes/almost lover...

Just thought it would be nice to share it with you.

P.S. To Jayson... never will i dedicate this song to you. Remember when I first told you I love you? I meant it to last forever. I will never let you go anyway... So yeah, you're kinda glued to me!

P.P.S. I really thought its sweet of you to concede that you have to put up with my tantrums because "we'll be living together for a long long time anyway."

♥♥ ^,^* ♥♥